Optimism is NOT Arrogance

Arrogance is the belief that you are BETTER than others. Optimism is the belief that you have the same CHANCE as others. We all have the chance to achieve our dreams. Don't ever let anyone tell you differently.

Query Letter #4 - A New Twist

This one actually got a nibble, although I was just messing around.  I'd be curious to see if other agents like it.  It's risky, I wouldn't recommend betting the house on an approach such as this.

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I write to you today from the eighteenth century, with the hope that you will allow me to introduce two young boys, Masters Jefferson and Benjamin, who arrived at my home over two years ago.  They claim to be from the twenty-first century, and judging from their demeanor, clothing, and most obvious, their character, I have no reason to doubt them.
 
I beg you please give them leave to tell their story.  They sought me out to capture their words, but it was my friend Christopher Pinchbeck, Jr., who gave them their much needed support.  You see, the lads have come across a timepiece - a pocket watch - that does not tell the time…it moves it.  A most unusual invention, and I dare say a most dangerous one, this watch has fallen into the hands of the boys’ nemesis Professor Roger Ferguson.  This Professor has evaded the boys and has in his devious plans a design on altering history.
 
I shudder to think what the future might be like if Professor Ferguson succeeds. 
 
Who am I?  I am but a humble storyteller: a writer of fiction and frivolity for young readers.  I seek to entertain and educate the young minds of boys and girls alike.  THE TIMEPIECE CHRONICLES is my latest endeavor, one that I would very much like to share with you.  If you are so inclined as to indulge me, I would be honored to present to you a sample of this work.
 
Regardless of your decision, I wish you great fortune in your work, and I remain
 
Sincerely yours,

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Again, I think this falls into the "cutesy" category that turns off many agents.  If you're like me and have tried everything and written a bunch of times to no avail, what can it hurt right?  But I only sent this out once or twice, I think.

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Dear Kevin,

Greetings from the assistant to Jennifer Weltz.

Jennifer asked me to pass along the following message:

I have read your query with interest and would like to see the first three chapters.

I do not charge a reading fee, but I do require a two week exclusive read.
Please email the materials as one .rtf, .odt, or.pdf file (no .doc or docx files please) that has embedded your query letter and contact information.

I look forward to getting more familiar with your work!
(21 day turnaround.  ROCKIN'!!!)

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