I don't like to blog much...

You can probably tell by my infrequent posts that I'm not a big blogger.  So today, in free form style, I'm going to explore why that is.

Writing is hard work.  There's that.  Not just the typing, I mean, that's easy for anyone who can type 72 words a minute.  But the mental preparation required to write takes discipline, and most important of all, confidence.  I kinda lack both.

Discipline means being able to get yourself focused to the task at hand.  Knowing you have something to say and a strong will to make sure it gets said.  Confidence means you don't think what you have to say sucks.

I have a discipline problem because I have a confidence problem.  It's hard to stay focused on what you want to say when there's a big part of your mind telling you "No one cares what you have to say."

Anyone else hear that voice?

Thought so.  So here's what I'm going to try to do from now on.  I'm going to write despite what that voice says, and I'm gonna say what I wanna say regardless of who listens or who cares.  Because here's the most important perk of writing that no one tells you about:

It's your way to capture your thoughts, your dreams, your characters, their thoughts, their dreams, all down on paper (or digital) forever.  It's a manual recording device for your brain.  That's it.  Some will read it and love it, some will read it and hate it and some may read it and not understand a word you're saying.  But that's like you, isn't it?  Does everyone immediately "get" you?  Even after meeting them do they fully "understand" you or know exactly where you're coming from?  No.  Some will meet you and love you, some will meet you and hate you and some will meet you and not understand a word you're saying.

But that's ok.  That's what makes us unique.

So after just getting rejected from an agent for the bazillionth time, I'm going to try working on a new book that hopefully may make some of what I'm saying a little more clear.  I may have mentioned the book before:  Dealing With Dudes and Chicks.  It's something that's been brewing in my mind for close to 10 years, but I've never had the guts to self-publish it, because it's a controversial way of getting teens to think, based on my ideas as a parent.

Well, I've got the guts now.  So keep an eye out for Dealing With Dudes and Chicks.  Coming to Amazon soon.


.....and in the meantime, if you haven't, check out my Timepiece Chronicles and Under a Broken Sun...  :)

Being True to Yourself

Somedays, you just have to throw off the past, and begin again.  Whether it's a book that you never can quite finish, or a chapter in your life that doesn't seem to end, it's imperative that each one of us realize WE have the power to make these changes in our lives.

And changes in our lives will only stick if we make in them in alignment with who we truly want to be.  "Be the change you wish to see" as Ghandi once said.  You can't do that if you're unsure of who you should be, (you SHOULDN'T be anyone) or who others think you are (who cares?)  It comes from within.

Some may call it God - a calling.  Some may call it the soul.  Others may not believe in any of that and just think of it as a free choice.  All are valid and different interpretations of the same thing.  It's you.

It's about time I start living by those ideals.  It's time I stop seeking approval from others as to who I am, and start molding that mound of clay I've been sitting in front of for forty years.

I AM.

The most powerful words in the universe, as I've said many times.

Nothing is impossible when it comes to being who you are.  There are no boundaries.  Approval is not necessary from anyone except yourself.  Your soul knows who you are.  It's just waiting for you to see it.